Narrator:
For more than a year, ominous rumours had been privately circulating
among high-level Western leaders that …..
.
….. Dr. Strangelove The Second plans to bomb the USA.
'For far too long, the USA has been outsourcing our bombing in
places such as Iraq, Afghanistan and Libya. It's time we brought the
bombing home. Why should the USA bomb those countries when we could bomb
our own infrastructure. Think of the boost to USA business when
reconstruction commences'.
Queried
on the wisdom of creating a precedent, Dr. Strangelove The Second,
was quick to cite the USA's long-term history of bombing internationally.
'I've
always done this, I don't need to tell you. Hiroshima? How you like
them apples? And as for chemical weapons, well, I exported tonnes of
napalm and Agent Orange all over South-East Asia and look how those
economies have boomed since then. What I'm planning is nothing new.'
When
pressed for details of schedules and targets, Dr. Strangelove The
Second said
'A
draft list of sites already exists, mainly in desert areas with low
population densities.'
Asked
about reports that many people are on the move, creating a refugee
problem, Dr. Strangelove The Second replied
'These
are Native Americans. They're nomadic people, not refugees. They're
migrants, seeking to benefit from the the opportunities this bombing
will bring.'
Dr.
Strangelove The Second dealt curtly with the proposal that medicines
and food parcels should be dropped instead of bombs.
'This
is business. Not welfare.'
When
further queried about the dangers of acting unilaterally in this
fashion, Dr. Strangelove The Second revealed that France plans to bomb France, with specific
targets in The Loire Valley and in Provence.
'France
has a long history of bombing all over the world. Even now France is
bombing Chad, wherever that is. And, like me, France is keen to
bring the benefits of targeted surgical strikes back home. For far
too long, I have been exporting my best bombs and out-sourcing
major reconstruction opportunities. France feels the same. I am
confident that the UK will arrive at a similar decision and begin
bombing parts of the Wiltshire countryside near the chemical weapons
facility Porton Down.'
Dr.
Strangelove: or How I Learned to Love the Bomb; film; Stanley
Kubrick; Columbia Pictures Corporation; Los Angeles; 1964
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